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cap_ironman2010-12-29 12:35 am
cap_ironman_fe) wrote in cap_ironman2010-12-29 12:35 am
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cursor_mundi!
Title: They Start with the Best of Intentions
Author:brilligspoons
Summary: For the following prompt: “Steve and Tony join a book club.” Wherein Tony is against it from the beginning and Steve admits that Tony is right about romance novels (maybe).
Pairings/Characters: Steve/Tony
Word Count: 1,070
Universe: MA
Rating: PG
Warnings: None!
Betas:harmonyangel <333
A/N: Only one of the two books mentioned in this fic is real (to my knowledge, anyway).
Enjoy!
***
Of all the ridiculous ideas in the world, Steve had to go and get stuck on this one, Tony thought. It could’ve been anything. It could’ve been advanced fencing classes, or another martial arts form. He might’ve settled on going back to school, or learning to embroider. I wouldn’t have laughed at him, not even for that one. Well. Maybe he would have, but he would’ve done so far away from Steve’s hearing. Miles away, even. And if it had been embroidery, maybe Steve wouldn’t have felt the need tocoerce manipulate force include Tony in his newest hobby.
“It’s not even a real hobby,” Tony mumbled under his breath. “It’s a fad that people who watch too much Oprah have bought into. They’ll forget about it in a year or two when the next big thing comes into fashion, and they’ll natter on about how juvenile this all was.”
“Tony,” Steve said, “stop complaining and pick a book. And stay away from the romance section, that is completely inappropriate for the club.”
“Who says?” Tony demanded. “Vanessa spends half the time finding ridiculous reasons to rub her hands all over your biceps, and Adam most certainly did not spill an entire gallon of water on you by accident that one time you wore the white t-shirt.” Steve sighed. “They probably have piles of those novels on their bedside tables,” Tony continued, staunchly refusing to stop ranting despite Steve’s disdainful look. “And you know what? They probably cross out the hero’s name and write yours in place of it. I will bet you anything.”
“Tony,” Steve said in the same tone of voice he used whenever he had to acknowledge some of Peter’s more painful puns, “the book club is populated by discerning and highly intelligent men and women who have graciously allowed us to join them in their quest for intellectual enrichment and betterment. You will not insult them by suggesting they read and discuss The Pirate Rogue’s Captive Virgin Lover.”
Why not? Tony wanted to ask. He didn’t think the book sounded that bad, actually. The cover was horrendous, of course, but the back cover blurb suggested the female protagonist might do more than swoon and weep. Tony waited until Steve had turned his back to him, then he snatched the book off the shelf and hid it in the cart under their other purchases.
“Well? Have you decided? I think Jan mentioned something about a Grey’s Anatomy marathon.”
“Can’t you just pick one and say it was my idea?” Tony whined. Steve gave him A Look. “Ugh, fine. Does this one sound intellectually enriching enough for you, Mr. Betterment?”
“The Crimson Petal and the White,” Steve read off the cover. “Better. I’ll send an email to the group later.”
“I have internet access, too, you know,” Tony grumbled.
“I don’t trust you not to word the message like you would to those poor scientists in your R&D department you’re always chewing out.”
Tony sniffed but put the approved book in the cart and walked up to the register without responding.
***
“I can’t even believe you right now,” Tony hissed.
“Tony, you know I can’t show up like this. I have two broken ribs and a torn rotator cuff, I think they’re going to notice something’s wrong.”
“So? Why does you not being able to go mean I have to go by myself?”
“Because we promised to bring the snacks for this meeting. It’s not fair for both of us to skip when they’re expecting refreshments.”
“I am not going. And I’m going to prove that you planned this.”
“Yes, Tony, I planned for MODOC to escape from prison and launch an attack on the Bronx with a little help from Loki. That’s exactly what happened. And yes, you are going to book club. Don’t forget to bring chips and salsa.”
***
It took all of Tony’s charm and restraint not to roll his eyes when the book club collectively pouted as he told them Steve wouldn’t be able to join them that evening. He shoved the giant bag of tortilla chips and the jar of salsa at Adam before removing his coat. “Yes, he’s very sorry,” he grit out. “I’m sure he’s feeling perfectly wretched right now, and not at all enjoying whatever new movies he picked up at the store before we were alerted to the attack."
"What was that?" Adam asked.
"Nothing," Tony said.
"Is he all right?" Vanessa inquired. "You said something about broken ribs."
"Oh, he'll be right as rain in a day or two," Tony assured her. "He heals quickly. Anyway, I'm sure they're more bruised than broken, but I suppose it doesn't hurt to be cautious."
The other members of the club (Chelsea and her girlfriend Tara, Michael, and another Adam, oddly enough) nodded. "Still," Vanessa continued, "you must feel just awful right now, being away from your boyfriend in his time of need."
Time of need? Tony forced a smile. "Yes, it's truly horrible. A friend of ours is keeping an eye on him, of course. I made sure of that." He made a mental note to delete the text to Peter that read "Torture him."
"So," Tony said, "what did we all think of the book? I freely admit that I only managed the first few pages or so - work got a bit crazy, you know how it is."
The room fell silent. Heavy blushes rose on each of their faces. “I was a bit surprised by the suggestion,” Michael said. “Romance novels aren’t usually my thing, but I thought I’d keep an open mind.”
Romance novel?
Tara coughed. “It was rather...”
“Bawdy,” Chelsea interrupted with a smirk. “Graphic as hell.”
"I see," Tony said gleefully. "Tell me everything."
***
Tony burst through the door and into the bedroom. Steve was lying on the bed, Tony's secret romance novel purchase open in his hands.
"Maybe you were right, Tony," Steve said without looking up. "This book isn't all that bad."
"Forget that," he replied. "You will never guess what we talked about in book club tonight."
Steve glanced at him. "If I'll never guess, you might as well just tell me already."
"Did you ever get around to actually reading the book you made me suggest?"
"...I have a feeling I'm going to regret this, but no. Why?"
Tony grinned.
END
Author:
brilligspoonsSummary: For the following prompt: “Steve and Tony join a book club.” Wherein Tony is against it from the beginning and Steve admits that Tony is right about romance novels (maybe).
Pairings/Characters: Steve/Tony
Word Count: 1,070
Universe: MA
Rating: PG
Warnings: None!
Betas:
harmonyangel <333A/N: Only one of the two books mentioned in this fic is real (to my knowledge, anyway).
Enjoy!
***
Of all the ridiculous ideas in the world, Steve had to go and get stuck on this one, Tony thought. It could’ve been anything. It could’ve been advanced fencing classes, or another martial arts form. He might’ve settled on going back to school, or learning to embroider. I wouldn’t have laughed at him, not even for that one. Well. Maybe he would have, but he would’ve done so far away from Steve’s hearing. Miles away, even. And if it had been embroidery, maybe Steve wouldn’t have felt the need to
“It’s not even a real hobby,” Tony mumbled under his breath. “It’s a fad that people who watch too much Oprah have bought into. They’ll forget about it in a year or two when the next big thing comes into fashion, and they’ll natter on about how juvenile this all was.”
“Tony,” Steve said, “stop complaining and pick a book. And stay away from the romance section, that is completely inappropriate for the club.”
“Who says?” Tony demanded. “Vanessa spends half the time finding ridiculous reasons to rub her hands all over your biceps, and Adam most certainly did not spill an entire gallon of water on you by accident that one time you wore the white t-shirt.” Steve sighed. “They probably have piles of those novels on their bedside tables,” Tony continued, staunchly refusing to stop ranting despite Steve’s disdainful look. “And you know what? They probably cross out the hero’s name and write yours in place of it. I will bet you anything.”
“Tony,” Steve said in the same tone of voice he used whenever he had to acknowledge some of Peter’s more painful puns, “the book club is populated by discerning and highly intelligent men and women who have graciously allowed us to join them in their quest for intellectual enrichment and betterment. You will not insult them by suggesting they read and discuss The Pirate Rogue’s Captive Virgin Lover.”
Why not? Tony wanted to ask. He didn’t think the book sounded that bad, actually. The cover was horrendous, of course, but the back cover blurb suggested the female protagonist might do more than swoon and weep. Tony waited until Steve had turned his back to him, then he snatched the book off the shelf and hid it in the cart under their other purchases.
“Well? Have you decided? I think Jan mentioned something about a Grey’s Anatomy marathon.”
“Can’t you just pick one and say it was my idea?” Tony whined. Steve gave him A Look. “Ugh, fine. Does this one sound intellectually enriching enough for you, Mr. Betterment?”
“The Crimson Petal and the White,” Steve read off the cover. “Better. I’ll send an email to the group later.”
“I have internet access, too, you know,” Tony grumbled.
“I don’t trust you not to word the message like you would to those poor scientists in your R&D department you’re always chewing out.”
Tony sniffed but put the approved book in the cart and walked up to the register without responding.
***
“I can’t even believe you right now,” Tony hissed.
“Tony, you know I can’t show up like this. I have two broken ribs and a torn rotator cuff, I think they’re going to notice something’s wrong.”
“So? Why does you not being able to go mean I have to go by myself?”
“Because we promised to bring the snacks for this meeting. It’s not fair for both of us to skip when they’re expecting refreshments.”
“I am not going. And I’m going to prove that you planned this.”
“Yes, Tony, I planned for MODOC to escape from prison and launch an attack on the Bronx with a little help from Loki. That’s exactly what happened. And yes, you are going to book club. Don’t forget to bring chips and salsa.”
***
It took all of Tony’s charm and restraint not to roll his eyes when the book club collectively pouted as he told them Steve wouldn’t be able to join them that evening. He shoved the giant bag of tortilla chips and the jar of salsa at Adam before removing his coat. “Yes, he’s very sorry,” he grit out. “I’m sure he’s feeling perfectly wretched right now, and not at all enjoying whatever new movies he picked up at the store before we were alerted to the attack."
"What was that?" Adam asked.
"Nothing," Tony said.
"Is he all right?" Vanessa inquired. "You said something about broken ribs."
"Oh, he'll be right as rain in a day or two," Tony assured her. "He heals quickly. Anyway, I'm sure they're more bruised than broken, but I suppose it doesn't hurt to be cautious."
The other members of the club (Chelsea and her girlfriend Tara, Michael, and another Adam, oddly enough) nodded. "Still," Vanessa continued, "you must feel just awful right now, being away from your boyfriend in his time of need."
Time of need? Tony forced a smile. "Yes, it's truly horrible. A friend of ours is keeping an eye on him, of course. I made sure of that." He made a mental note to delete the text to Peter that read "Torture him."
"So," Tony said, "what did we all think of the book? I freely admit that I only managed the first few pages or so - work got a bit crazy, you know how it is."
The room fell silent. Heavy blushes rose on each of their faces. “I was a bit surprised by the suggestion,” Michael said. “Romance novels aren’t usually my thing, but I thought I’d keep an open mind.”
Romance novel?
Tara coughed. “It was rather...”
“Bawdy,” Chelsea interrupted with a smirk. “Graphic as hell.”
"I see," Tony said gleefully. "Tell me everything."
***
Tony burst through the door and into the bedroom. Steve was lying on the bed, Tony's secret romance novel purchase open in his hands.
"Maybe you were right, Tony," Steve said without looking up. "This book isn't all that bad."
"Forget that," he replied. "You will never guess what we talked about in book club tonight."
Steve glanced at him. "If I'll never guess, you might as well just tell me already."
"Did you ever get around to actually reading the book you made me suggest?"
"...I have a feeling I'm going to regret this, but no. Why?"
Tony grinned.
END