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cap_ironman2009-08-18 06:37 pm
Fic: Conversations with a Broom cupboard.
Title: Conversations with a broom cupboard
Author: <lj user="cat_13145">
Rating: PG 13
Pairings/Characters: Steve/Tony, Sharon/Sam.
A/N: Inspired by this fic, http://www.fanfiction.net/s/1777025/1/Dealing which, while it is Bobby/Jean Paul, is written in entirely in dialogue, which is what I tried to do here. It didn’t work entirely, but I still think people might like it.
Summary: Title pretty much says it all.
“Steve. Come out of there. You’re being ridiculous.”
“Go away Sharon.”
“You’re not going to solve anything hiding in a broom closet. In fact wasn’t that what got you into this situation?”
A groan
“Come on.”
“No.”
“You’re supposed to be addressing the troops in ten minutes. Fury will kill you if you’re late, he’s actually in full dress and you know how much he hates its.”
“It was full dress that got me into this situation.”
“O.k. so Stark’s got the control of a 14 year old boy, that doesn’t mean you have to indulge him.”
“Sharon?”
“Yeah?”
“In case you haven’t noticed I’m not in dress uniform.”
“I don’t have X-Ray vision, Steve and if Agent Gregory isn’t exaggerating in the canteen, when he opened that door, neither of you were wearing anything much.”
“We weren’t undressed.”
“No, but he still got an eyeful.”
“Sharon?”
“Still here Steve.”
“Are you mad at me?”
“No. That doesn’t mean I don’t wish you’d told me, then we could have double dated.”
“Wouldn’t that have been uncomfortable?”
“It was a joke, Steve.”
“Oh.”
“No, I’m not mad. Not even surprised really. You and I were never going to work out, and if Stark makes you happy_”
“He does.”
“Then I’m fine with it.”
“Thanks.”
”You’re welcome.”
“How are things going with you and Sam?”
“Good. I mean it’s different to what I expected, but it’s still…”
“Sam has some experience with SHIELD agents.”
“You mean that slut, Morales? I can kick her butt.”
“I don’t doubt that.”
“Beyond that, in his own way, Sam’s as much of a gentleman as you are.”
“I know that. Doesn’t mean I won’t worry about you.”
“I know that, and thanks.”
“You’re welcome.”
“You still have to come out of there, though.”
“Why?”
“Leaving aside saving us from a homicidal Nick_”
“He’s so happy to be back, he couldn’t care.”
“And this ridiculous uniform I have put on for the occasion- honestly if I ever get my hands on who designed this, I’ll_”
“It was Jan.”
“Oh.”
“Yeah.”
“Leaving aside that. You have to save your boyfriend.”
“What?”
“Nick cornered him in the canteen and gave him the hurt him and I’ll castrate you lecture, then Dum Dum did the same, only he used a few more choice words and some suggestions he got from the Skulls, and now James_”
“Bucky?”
“You’re like his big brother and father rolled into one, Steve; you honestly thought that he’d be fine with you dating the guy he still partly blames for your death?”
“What’s he doing?”
“Ahh. Success. The cupboard is now open a bit more. Nothing really, just saying that if he ever even thinks about hurting you, he’ll hunt him down like a dog, and…well he lapsed into Russian for a bit, so I can’t be sure, but from the way every SHIELD guy was covering his bits, I can guess he wasn’t offering to bake a cake. Then he mentioned something about a Major Abbess?”
“Absence?”
“That’s it.”
“No.”
“Ahh. We are finally out of the closet. Relax Steve, there’s no need to run, he was barely getting started when I left.”
“It’s just…”
“What?”
“I don’t want to jinx it.”
“It won’t. Believe me; Stark was looking like he was vaguely amused at Bucky’s threats.”
“I don’t want him to change his mind. People aren’t always tolerant.”
“This isn’t people, Rogers. This is SHIELD.”
“That could be worse.”
“What on earth makes you say that…Hang on you think we’re like the army?!”
“Things Fury said, back in the day…”
“Haven’t you ever heard that the saying when you point the finger there’s three pointing back at ya?”
“Sharon, what are you saying? Sharon?!”
Fini
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“It was Jan.”
“Oh.”
That part really made me smile. So did this:
"Nothing really, just saying that if he ever even thinks about hurting you, he’ll hunt him down like a dog, and…well he lapsed into Russian for a bit, so I can’t be sure, but from the way every SHIELD guy was covering his bits, I can guess he wasn’t offering to bake a cake."
I think the biggest danger with dialog-only fic is that it can get confusing about who is saying and doing what, but you were very clear. I liked how you had Sharon narrate Steve's slow emergence from the closet - I thought it worked very well!
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