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cap_ironman2009-12-20 02:24 pm
heworedecadence.livejournal.com) wrote in cap_ironman2009-12-20 02:24 pm
Fic: Live Through This and You Won't Look Back
Title: Live Through This and I Won't Look Back
Author:![[livejournal.com profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/external/lj-userinfo.gif)
heworedecadence
Rating: PG
Word Count: 1701
Summary: Tony returns to the Tower after Norman Osborn is defeated, with Steve as moral support.
Warning: Spoilers for Invincible Iron Man #21
A/N: Thanks tojazzypom for the beta and therobotmuse for the inspiration.
The empty shell of his former home stood before Tony like a ghost.
The thickness that hung in the air were the memories- the good and the bad- which were coming back in pieces to his mind like a puzzle coming together with the hand of a meticulous child . The walls were bare save for the paint that he'd chosen when he built the place, even the kitchens were stripped of appliances and fixtures to make way for the new old owner to lay down new choices. The only light was the sun as it cascaded along the floor as if the clouds had opened up a spotlight upon request as a sign from God.
"I can't do this."
Tony Stark stood beside the elevator door that was now closing behind him, taking in the sight of the home he'd built for himself, offered up to his friends, and then had it yanked away from underneath him, leaving him with nothing more than the suit on his back. He didn't know where his personal items had gone to, and he didn't know where he would get the funds to replace them.
He let out a heavy sigh, raking his fingers through his still short hair, re-growth from the shave job he'd done with a disposable razor in a hotel bathroom between New York and California.
"I don't even know where I'll get the money to rehab this place and get it in working condition..." he started to pace the floors, his hands tracing over the support columns of the structure.
Steve Rogers watched as Tony wandered the penthouse level of Stark Tower- slash Avengers Tower- with the haunted gaze of a veteran returning to the battle field years after the war concluded. Steve knew his own face had held that look a few times. He also knew he needed to give Tony a few moments to think and react before interjecting his own piece. He let the elevator doors close behind him, stepping away from the doors and completely into the room before approaching Tony as he stood in front of one of the large windows and stared out to the city view.
They'd won a war but it had cost them. Just like Tony had said it would.
"Steve..."
Steve responded by resting a comforting hand on Tony's shoulder.
"We'll figure it out. We always do. This is your home Tony. You built it to your specifications, you opened it up to your way of life and your friends. Even though it was in someone else's grip for awhile, the essence of the place is Stark." He offered gently.
Tony's voice was thick in his reply as he turned toward the window to face out, blocking Steve's view of his face. "I can't afford to.
Steve shook his head. "Don't worry about that right now. We'll figure something out. Just like I said we would. The Avengers always manage,. You know that better than anyone else."
Tony looked at him for a moment and offered a weak smirk, but his eyes lacked the life of believing Steve's statement. He turned back to face the window and let out a heavy sigh, his whole frame moving with the expelling of air from his lungs, slumping with defeat. Steve squeezed Tony's shoulder in response.
"Thanks for coming with me. I don't think I could have done this alone and I don't think Pepper could have done it with with me."
Pepper was taking some time away from him, and Tony understood that. He'd put her through a lot, asked for more than he should have. She had been there every step of the way waiting for him to expire and keeping him from doing so. Pepper was in California with Henry for the time being and Tony was pretty sure something was going on there, but he hadn't really had the time to think it through...
"That's what friends are for." Steve replied without a second thought.
Tony flinched at the word like an unexpected slap. He shouldn't have reacted that way but, he hadn't expected Steve to call him a friend, not yet, not after all they'd been through. Not without some discussion of boundaries and footing and apologies. He felt guilty for expecting more than a simple statement of declared camaraderie as he turned to him.
"Are we friends, then?"
Steve stared at him, dropping his hand away from Tony's shoulder. They hadn't really gotten a moment to discuss the way things had been left. Tony hadn't remembered the past two years when he woke up, and was still regaining his memories. Steve had still felt the anger gnawing at his heart when he looked at Tony even now, even after their battle for Asgard, even after fighting side by side with the Avengers and Thor as if nothing had happened.
He finally smiled, it was soft and reassuring as he'd been doing the whole day.
"We have a lot of time to make up for. We have a lot to talk about when you're ready but... I think time will heal all wounds. We've forgiven each other for dumb things in the past, and I don't see why now would be different."
Tony stared at him before the first genuine smile reached his lips, the first one Steve had seen in days. It wasn't large, it didn't reach his eyes and it barely showed any teeth but there was a glimmer of hope in Tony's blue gaze that eased some of the tense, tight feeling in Steve's chest.
"Yeah... okay. We'll... figure it out." He took a breath before turning to face the room. "We can do this."
Steve laughed a low chuckle and patted Tony's back. "The Avengers will always be... I think we've learned that. No matter who is in charge or on the team or what configuration or name they take... the world will always have the Avengers. I'm proud of that and you should be too, Tony."
Tony's eyes traced the room, the ghosts already doing their routines before him. Jess and Luke with their baby on the couch, laughing at her gurgles. Peter hanging from the walls and perching himself in strange places. Logan reluctantly involving himself in group activity. Carol and Jessica discussing strategy and Steve dragging him from his lab to socialize...
"We could do it again. We should all come back here, make this our home again. Merge the two teams... it's dumb to have two teams in the same city."
Steve could see the gears turning in Tony's brain as if displayed in X-ray as Tony started to pace the room.
"I think we should get this place back together, make it better than it was... this whole building will be the Avengers HQ... I mean, let's be reasonable here, I'm not starting another company now. Not for a long time anyway. And then we all meet, both teams... Hank and his team and then Clint and the others... we have a big meeting and we lay it all on the table, every grievance, every harsh word, all of it. We just get it out and we agree that we move on from there. Because that's what we've always done."
Steve watched the fervour with which Tony spoke: the way he seemed to start up again, the way he used to be when he'd have to charge that heart of his. He couldn't help but glance at the glowing circle in the center of Tony's chest that was running his whole body now. Remembering the roof top in Broxton where they'd given him a "hot wire" as he'd called it. He couldn't stop the smile because this was a glimpse of the old Tony Stark. The unshakable, unbreakable and enduring man he'd always known. This was the Invincible Iron Man before him.
"Sure. That sounds like a plan. I'm completely for that idea as long as you realize that there might be a few who walk away. There might be some people who aren't interested in the team playing, especially when the team includes this group. So prepare yourself for it not going perfectly and not everyone being on board." Steve reasoned.
Tony nodded. He knew that Steve meant people like James Barnes and maybe Clint. But Clint was hit or miss. Luke might not be eager to join up with him again and Peter might be hesitant. He was aware this could all blow up in his face.
"Okay. I am. I will be. I just..." He seemed to deflate again, only for a moment. "I need something to keep going."
"So do I." Steve offered.
Tony nodded and looked at him. Steve was there, supporting him, offering a hand again after everything they'd been through. After everything he'd done and forgotten and remembered. Steve had helped him come back. Tony pulled the other man into an embrace, a tight hug that allowed him to just calm a moment before he went to the next range of emotions he was going to feel today.
Steve returned the embrace, wrapping his arms around Tony's smaller frame. He let out a breath and just held him, waiting for Tony to be the one to break the embrace. Tony needed the hug and Steve wasn't going to deny him a moment of it.
When Tony finally did break he smirked, and Steve could have sworn he saw Tony wipe some tears away from his cheekbones.
"I'm starving. Do you want to get some pizza?"
Steve nodded. "Pizza sounds good. Let's go."
Tony didn't hesitate in his stride for the elevator. He might have just been hungry but Steve knew that part of him just wanted to be out of that tower. It wouldn't have its life until it was fixed up again, and part of him wondered if that was the same with Tony. Maybe he'd be complete when his home was restored. When he had a place to belong.
At the heart of it, wasn't that what they all needed?
Fin
Author:
heworedecadenceRating: PG
Word Count: 1701
Summary: Tony returns to the Tower after Norman Osborn is defeated, with Steve as moral support.
Warning: Spoilers for Invincible Iron Man #21
A/N: Thanks to
jazzypom for the beta and therobotmuse for the inspiration.The empty shell of his former home stood before Tony like a ghost.
The thickness that hung in the air were the memories- the good and the bad- which were coming back in pieces to his mind like a puzzle coming together with the hand of a meticulous child . The walls were bare save for the paint that he'd chosen when he built the place, even the kitchens were stripped of appliances and fixtures to make way for the new old owner to lay down new choices. The only light was the sun as it cascaded along the floor as if the clouds had opened up a spotlight upon request as a sign from God.
"I can't do this."
Tony Stark stood beside the elevator door that was now closing behind him, taking in the sight of the home he'd built for himself, offered up to his friends, and then had it yanked away from underneath him, leaving him with nothing more than the suit on his back. He didn't know where his personal items had gone to, and he didn't know where he would get the funds to replace them.
He let out a heavy sigh, raking his fingers through his still short hair, re-growth from the shave job he'd done with a disposable razor in a hotel bathroom between New York and California.
"I don't even know where I'll get the money to rehab this place and get it in working condition..." he started to pace the floors, his hands tracing over the support columns of the structure.
Steve Rogers watched as Tony wandered the penthouse level of Stark Tower- slash Avengers Tower- with the haunted gaze of a veteran returning to the battle field years after the war concluded. Steve knew his own face had held that look a few times. He also knew he needed to give Tony a few moments to think and react before interjecting his own piece. He let the elevator doors close behind him, stepping away from the doors and completely into the room before approaching Tony as he stood in front of one of the large windows and stared out to the city view.
They'd won a war but it had cost them. Just like Tony had said it would.
"Steve..."
Steve responded by resting a comforting hand on Tony's shoulder.
"We'll figure it out. We always do. This is your home Tony. You built it to your specifications, you opened it up to your way of life and your friends. Even though it was in someone else's grip for awhile, the essence of the place is Stark." He offered gently.
Tony's voice was thick in his reply as he turned toward the window to face out, blocking Steve's view of his face. "I can't afford to.
Steve shook his head. "Don't worry about that right now. We'll figure something out. Just like I said we would. The Avengers always manage,. You know that better than anyone else."
Tony looked at him for a moment and offered a weak smirk, but his eyes lacked the life of believing Steve's statement. He turned back to face the window and let out a heavy sigh, his whole frame moving with the expelling of air from his lungs, slumping with defeat. Steve squeezed Tony's shoulder in response.
"Thanks for coming with me. I don't think I could have done this alone and I don't think Pepper could have done it with with me."
Pepper was taking some time away from him, and Tony understood that. He'd put her through a lot, asked for more than he should have. She had been there every step of the way waiting for him to expire and keeping him from doing so. Pepper was in California with Henry for the time being and Tony was pretty sure something was going on there, but he hadn't really had the time to think it through...
"That's what friends are for." Steve replied without a second thought.
Tony flinched at the word like an unexpected slap. He shouldn't have reacted that way but, he hadn't expected Steve to call him a friend, not yet, not after all they'd been through. Not without some discussion of boundaries and footing and apologies. He felt guilty for expecting more than a simple statement of declared camaraderie as he turned to him.
"Are we friends, then?"
Steve stared at him, dropping his hand away from Tony's shoulder. They hadn't really gotten a moment to discuss the way things had been left. Tony hadn't remembered the past two years when he woke up, and was still regaining his memories. Steve had still felt the anger gnawing at his heart when he looked at Tony even now, even after their battle for Asgard, even after fighting side by side with the Avengers and Thor as if nothing had happened.
He finally smiled, it was soft and reassuring as he'd been doing the whole day.
"We have a lot of time to make up for. We have a lot to talk about when you're ready but... I think time will heal all wounds. We've forgiven each other for dumb things in the past, and I don't see why now would be different."
Tony stared at him before the first genuine smile reached his lips, the first one Steve had seen in days. It wasn't large, it didn't reach his eyes and it barely showed any teeth but there was a glimmer of hope in Tony's blue gaze that eased some of the tense, tight feeling in Steve's chest.
"Yeah... okay. We'll... figure it out." He took a breath before turning to face the room. "We can do this."
Steve laughed a low chuckle and patted Tony's back. "The Avengers will always be... I think we've learned that. No matter who is in charge or on the team or what configuration or name they take... the world will always have the Avengers. I'm proud of that and you should be too, Tony."
Tony's eyes traced the room, the ghosts already doing their routines before him. Jess and Luke with their baby on the couch, laughing at her gurgles. Peter hanging from the walls and perching himself in strange places. Logan reluctantly involving himself in group activity. Carol and Jessica discussing strategy and Steve dragging him from his lab to socialize...
"We could do it again. We should all come back here, make this our home again. Merge the two teams... it's dumb to have two teams in the same city."
Steve could see the gears turning in Tony's brain as if displayed in X-ray as Tony started to pace the room.
"I think we should get this place back together, make it better than it was... this whole building will be the Avengers HQ... I mean, let's be reasonable here, I'm not starting another company now. Not for a long time anyway. And then we all meet, both teams... Hank and his team and then Clint and the others... we have a big meeting and we lay it all on the table, every grievance, every harsh word, all of it. We just get it out and we agree that we move on from there. Because that's what we've always done."
Steve watched the fervour with which Tony spoke: the way he seemed to start up again, the way he used to be when he'd have to charge that heart of his. He couldn't help but glance at the glowing circle in the center of Tony's chest that was running his whole body now. Remembering the roof top in Broxton where they'd given him a "hot wire" as he'd called it. He couldn't stop the smile because this was a glimpse of the old Tony Stark. The unshakable, unbreakable and enduring man he'd always known. This was the Invincible Iron Man before him.
"Sure. That sounds like a plan. I'm completely for that idea as long as you realize that there might be a few who walk away. There might be some people who aren't interested in the team playing, especially when the team includes this group. So prepare yourself for it not going perfectly and not everyone being on board." Steve reasoned.
Tony nodded. He knew that Steve meant people like James Barnes and maybe Clint. But Clint was hit or miss. Luke might not be eager to join up with him again and Peter might be hesitant. He was aware this could all blow up in his face.
"Okay. I am. I will be. I just..." He seemed to deflate again, only for a moment. "I need something to keep going."
"So do I." Steve offered.
Tony nodded and looked at him. Steve was there, supporting him, offering a hand again after everything they'd been through. After everything he'd done and forgotten and remembered. Steve had helped him come back. Tony pulled the other man into an embrace, a tight hug that allowed him to just calm a moment before he went to the next range of emotions he was going to feel today.
Steve returned the embrace, wrapping his arms around Tony's smaller frame. He let out a breath and just held him, waiting for Tony to be the one to break the embrace. Tony needed the hug and Steve wasn't going to deny him a moment of it.
When Tony finally did break he smirked, and Steve could have sworn he saw Tony wipe some tears away from his cheekbones.
"I'm starving. Do you want to get some pizza?"
Steve nodded. "Pizza sounds good. Let's go."
Tony didn't hesitate in his stride for the elevator. He might have just been hungry but Steve knew that part of him just wanted to be out of that tower. It wouldn't have its life until it was fixed up again, and part of him wondered if that was the same with Tony. Maybe he'd be complete when his home was restored. When he had a place to belong.
At the heart of it, wasn't that what they all needed?
Fin
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no subject
I thought it was important to not fix everything and just be like "we'll see" because at the end of the day, that's what they do. They see what happens and then go from there.
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http://i79.photobucket.com/albums/j144/crimsonquills/slashymoments/00053tr5.jpg
http://i79.photobucket.com/albums/j144/crimsonquills/slashymoments/000546a7.jpg
Interesting evolution of ideas, here.
Over the years, Tony and Steve have played with this idea of 'continuance' a lot. Passing it back and forth, with minor changes.
They fine-tuned their personal identities, both in and out of costume...
But somewhere along the line, those parallel dreams started to interlock.
In his will, Steve trusted Tony with the legacy of Captain America, and the sanity of James Barnes.
Tony destroyed everything he had, to include his own -mind- (with which he had previously rebuilt everything else)...
...Partly to protect the Avengers. Other people too, but I'm betting those were the faces Tony saw, right before he gave the 'erase' command.
His and Steve's Avengers.
A team that can function without them now...
A joint legacy.
I didn't think this needed to be said any clearer, but you found a way to make it worth hearing again. Thank you.
no subject
Thank you for reading.
no subject
Thanks for posting!