Hey, hi, I'm also new to this pairing. Actually, I'm pretty new to the entire fandom. Which is to say, aside from some accumulated trivia, I'm only familiar with the movie-verse characterization of these guys so bear that in mind.
Whether or not I like a relationship dynamic depends largely on the author and whether or not they abuse stereotypes. I like slash because I like men. If I want to read about sexy times with ladies, there is plenty of het or fem-slash fic available. So any time an author starts to "feminize" part of a slash relationship, outside of specific kinks/tropes/fetishes, I lose interest. I I very much dislike reading stories where Steve is cast as so painfully bedroom shy and virginal, his sensibilities so delicate, that he needs Tony to help him find his penis. I dislike either of them acting like the leading lady in a Harlequin romance or an overly tragic teenage girl. If Top/Bottom designation results in that sort of thing, I go read something else.
That being said, aesthetically speaking, I like Steve on top for the most part. A case can be made for the 'experienced older man(Tony)/eager virgin(Steve)' dynamic but that's sort of a background thing for me, not a basis for particular positions other than "All of the above, please". Also, I'm pretty sure I have a trust kink. No matter who you are, you have to have a huge amount of trust to put yourself at the physical mercy of a person who could kill you with their bare hands without hardly trying. If you've been through the sorts of mental, emotional and physical betrayals Tony has? I don't think Tony even trust himself most of the time so letting Steve take the driver seat is hawt to me. Although Tony would still probably be a relentless backseat driver, so to speak. Since they're both proud, pig-headed stubborn and often recklessly brave though, I can't see them limiting their intimacy to one seating option, they'd have to switch it up once in awhile. Hehe, now I have their relationship scrolling through my head as a long distance road trip. Fun times.
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Whether or not I like a relationship dynamic depends largely on the author and whether or not they abuse stereotypes. I like slash because I like men. If I want to read about sexy times with ladies, there is plenty of het or fem-slash fic available. So any time an author starts to "feminize" part of a slash relationship, outside of specific kinks/tropes/fetishes, I lose interest. I I very much dislike reading stories where Steve is cast as so painfully bedroom shy and virginal, his sensibilities so delicate, that he needs Tony to help him find his penis. I dislike either of them acting like the leading lady in a Harlequin romance or an overly tragic teenage girl. If Top/Bottom designation results in that sort of thing, I go read something else.
That being said, aesthetically speaking, I like Steve on top for the most part. A case can be made for the 'experienced older man(Tony)/eager virgin(Steve)' dynamic but that's sort of a background thing for me, not a basis for particular positions other than "All of the above, please". Also, I'm pretty sure I have a trust kink. No matter who you are, you have to have a huge amount of trust to put yourself at the physical mercy of a person who could kill you with their bare hands without hardly trying. If you've been through the sorts of mental, emotional and physical betrayals Tony has? I don't think Tony even trust himself most of the time so letting Steve take the driver seat is hawt to me. Although Tony would still probably be a relentless backseat driver, so to speak. Since they're both proud, pig-headed stubborn and often recklessly brave though, I can't see them limiting their intimacy to one seating option, they'd have to switch it up once in awhile. Hehe, now I have their relationship scrolling through my head as a long distance road trip. Fun times.