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cap_ironman2014-01-07 12:05 am
salmastryon.livejournal.com) wrote in cap_ironman2014-01-07 12:05 am
Entry tags:
Fic: Peace Visits Not The Guilty Mind (3a/5)
Title: Peace Visits Not The Guilty Mind
Rating: M
Universe: Divergent 616
Warnings: Bones, Canon Type Violence, Angst, Steve Sulking, WIP,Canon Major Character Death(mentioned), Major Character Death(They get better), Happy Ending
Summary: Steve has come back from the dead. Now, he has to deal with what he wrought during the Civil War.
Author's Note: Well life being life, I don't have chapter three ready. What I've done is posted the flashback portion of chapter three, which is done, for you to read. I'm hoping to have the rest of it for you later this week. Since my post dates turned out to be unrealistic for me, I'm changing them to every other week.
Raikishi, the story is finished, so don't worry about being left hanging, editing is just being annoying. Chapter three being the most difficult to write is, of course, turning out to be the most difficult to edit.
Posting Schedule for Chapters
Chapter 4 – 01/20/2014
Chapter 5 – 01/27/2014
Bargaining
One moment Steve was surrounded by gunfire and men dying, the next Steve found himself amid a different type of rubble. The circle of onlookers were in hard hats and the heavy machinery was for building, not destroying. Steve was looking at Iron Man's expressionless mask and knew where he'd been dropped in time. He'd gone over this day enough in the last month, waiting for judgment in his cell.
“I brought him back, Steve.”
Steve could feel the empty pit opening up in his past self's gut. The leather creaked as his hand tightened on the strap of his shield. The Crimson Dynamo laid on the ground between Steve and Tony. The red chest plate was a mess of melted and shattered metal from where Tony had restarted the Crimson Dynamo's heart. Steve wasn't looking at the fallen villain. His gaze was locked on the man in front of him, the reason the Crimson Dynamo would be taking a detour to the hospital before he saw his holding cell.
Whatever was forcing him to relive moments of his life haphazardly certainly didn't pull its punches. Being dropped in combat could be confusing and physically trying, but moments like this were the worst.
Steve could feel his jaw muscles tightening. “That's not the point. You could have handled the situation without stopping the man's heart!” Back then he'd been so wrapped up in his anger. It'd been over a month since he'd last seen Tony face to face.“I can think of at least four ways--”
And now instead of being able to talk to Tony rationally, Steve had to deal with Iron Man killing a man in order to subdue him. Tony had always been more than willing to kill himself if it was the easiest solution, but another person?
“--And I can think of seven. But this one was the most expedient.”
Tony had killed a man just because it was more convenient. That had been just another thing to grate at Steve's nerves back then. Extremis had altered Tony in ways that Steve hadn't understood at first. That Steve still didn't understand.
Tony had been so excited about Extremis. He'd enthusiastically explained how it changed the way he interfaced with the suit, changed the way he viewed the world. Steve had been more concerned with stripping Tony out of his clothes and reassuring himself that Tony was alive and in one piece.
The tenseness in past-Steve's jaw was almost painful now and his eyes had narrowed. Behind it all, there was still that sinking hollow sensation. Back then Steve had thought that this wasn't his Tony standing in front of him. That it was a strange doppelganger that had grown into his place after Extremis. Steve felt ashamed to realize that much of that was from his own anger and doubts projected onto Iron Man's emotionless facade and mechanical voice.
The last time they'd talked in anything but a professional capacity, they'd argued. Well, Steve had argued, Tony had been calm and distracted. Steve was used to Tony bridging the gap, being the one to reach out and explain. This time that hadn't happened. Tony had been doing a million things with his new power to multitask and communicate. None of those things had involved talking to Steve.
“Expedient, Tony? Or interesting?”
Steve had hated this stranger he saw in Tony's skin. Extremis had saved Tony's life, but he'd thought it had killed Tony inch by inch in front of Steve and that there was nothing Steve could fight and defeat. There had only been Tony himself.
What would happen if Steve reached out his hand to grab Tony by the shoulder? What if he'd blurted out the override codes and lifted that face mask like he had wanted back then? He'd thought it was Extremis, but maybe he'd been wrong. Now he wondered if maybe it hadn't been Tony laying the ground work for his plans against SHRA.
Extremis had made slipping past security to look at the contents of people's hard drives child's play for Tony. Had Tony already known what was coming? This moment felt so much like when Steve had walked out of that room leaving an inebriated man to deal with his own problems all those years ago.
It had been so easy to talk to Vision, to leave a message for the future, so hopefully someone would rescue him from this hellish trip through the past. Perhaps Tony... But Tony was gone. Tony wouldn't be able to help him again.
Steve strained against his past self's gritted teeth. If he could just apologize or ask to talk, Tony could be there when the message was received. Tony would be there when he was rescued.
Steve's past self was a mass of tense corded muscles of anger and betrayal. His brow furrowed and lips pulled down into an intimidating frown. The muscles in his jaw twitched as he fought himself.
Iron Man's flat mechanical voice interrupted his efforts and sent things down the path they'd taken before.
“I have a two o'clock.”
As Tony soared up into the air, away from Steve, the moment was lost. Tony wouldn't be around to look for him. Tony wouldn't be there never giving up on finding Steve. He couldn't change the past, not even for Tony.
The energy he'd expended drained away from him, leaving an empty ache. While his past self's body was tense, Steve just felt worn. Back then he wanted nothing more than to lash out and destroy something. Steve just wanted it all to stop.
The ground crunched as Luke stepped up beside him. Steve didn't get to hear what Luke was going to say. Whatever force was torturing him has already clutched him up, torn him from his body and tossed him into another time, place and self, to relive his mistakes yet again, powerless to stop them. How much of him would be left, if he ever escaped this?
Rating: M
Universe: Divergent 616
Warnings: Bones, Canon Type Violence, Angst, Steve Sulking, WIP,
Summary: Steve has come back from the dead. Now, he has to deal with what he wrought during the Civil War.
Author's Note: Well life being life, I don't have chapter three ready. What I've done is posted the flashback portion of chapter three, which is done, for you to read. I'm hoping to have the rest of it for you later this week. Since my post dates turned out to be unrealistic for me, I'm changing them to every other week.
Raikishi, the story is finished, so don't worry about being left hanging, editing is just being annoying. Chapter three being the most difficult to write is, of course, turning out to be the most difficult to edit.
Chapter 4 – 01/20/2014
Chapter 5 – 01/27/2014
One moment Steve was surrounded by gunfire and men dying, the next Steve found himself amid a different type of rubble. The circle of onlookers were in hard hats and the heavy machinery was for building, not destroying. Steve was looking at Iron Man's expressionless mask and knew where he'd been dropped in time. He'd gone over this day enough in the last month, waiting for judgment in his cell.
“I brought him back, Steve.”
Steve could feel the empty pit opening up in his past self's gut. The leather creaked as his hand tightened on the strap of his shield. The Crimson Dynamo laid on the ground between Steve and Tony. The red chest plate was a mess of melted and shattered metal from where Tony had restarted the Crimson Dynamo's heart. Steve wasn't looking at the fallen villain. His gaze was locked on the man in front of him, the reason the Crimson Dynamo would be taking a detour to the hospital before he saw his holding cell.
Whatever was forcing him to relive moments of his life haphazardly certainly didn't pull its punches. Being dropped in combat could be confusing and physically trying, but moments like this were the worst.
Steve could feel his jaw muscles tightening. “That's not the point. You could have handled the situation without stopping the man's heart!” Back then he'd been so wrapped up in his anger. It'd been over a month since he'd last seen Tony face to face.“I can think of at least four ways--”
And now instead of being able to talk to Tony rationally, Steve had to deal with Iron Man killing a man in order to subdue him. Tony had always been more than willing to kill himself if it was the easiest solution, but another person?
“--And I can think of seven. But this one was the most expedient.”
Tony had killed a man just because it was more convenient. That had been just another thing to grate at Steve's nerves back then. Extremis had altered Tony in ways that Steve hadn't understood at first. That Steve still didn't understand.
Tony had been so excited about Extremis. He'd enthusiastically explained how it changed the way he interfaced with the suit, changed the way he viewed the world. Steve had been more concerned with stripping Tony out of his clothes and reassuring himself that Tony was alive and in one piece.
The tenseness in past-Steve's jaw was almost painful now and his eyes had narrowed. Behind it all, there was still that sinking hollow sensation. Back then Steve had thought that this wasn't his Tony standing in front of him. That it was a strange doppelganger that had grown into his place after Extremis. Steve felt ashamed to realize that much of that was from his own anger and doubts projected onto Iron Man's emotionless facade and mechanical voice.
The last time they'd talked in anything but a professional capacity, they'd argued. Well, Steve had argued, Tony had been calm and distracted. Steve was used to Tony bridging the gap, being the one to reach out and explain. This time that hadn't happened. Tony had been doing a million things with his new power to multitask and communicate. None of those things had involved talking to Steve.
“Expedient, Tony? Or interesting?”
Steve had hated this stranger he saw in Tony's skin. Extremis had saved Tony's life, but he'd thought it had killed Tony inch by inch in front of Steve and that there was nothing Steve could fight and defeat. There had only been Tony himself.
What would happen if Steve reached out his hand to grab Tony by the shoulder? What if he'd blurted out the override codes and lifted that face mask like he had wanted back then? He'd thought it was Extremis, but maybe he'd been wrong. Now he wondered if maybe it hadn't been Tony laying the ground work for his plans against SHRA.
Extremis had made slipping past security to look at the contents of people's hard drives child's play for Tony. Had Tony already known what was coming? This moment felt so much like when Steve had walked out of that room leaving an inebriated man to deal with his own problems all those years ago.
It had been so easy to talk to Vision, to leave a message for the future, so hopefully someone would rescue him from this hellish trip through the past. Perhaps Tony... But Tony was gone. Tony wouldn't be able to help him again.
Steve strained against his past self's gritted teeth. If he could just apologize or ask to talk, Tony could be there when the message was received. Tony would be there when he was rescued.
Steve's past self was a mass of tense corded muscles of anger and betrayal. His brow furrowed and lips pulled down into an intimidating frown. The muscles in his jaw twitched as he fought himself.
Iron Man's flat mechanical voice interrupted his efforts and sent things down the path they'd taken before.
“I have a two o'clock.”
As Tony soared up into the air, away from Steve, the moment was lost. Tony wouldn't be around to look for him. Tony wouldn't be there never giving up on finding Steve. He couldn't change the past, not even for Tony.
The energy he'd expended drained away from him, leaving an empty ache. While his past self's body was tense, Steve just felt worn. Back then he wanted nothing more than to lash out and destroy something. Steve just wanted it all to stop.
The ground crunched as Luke stepped up beside him. Steve didn't get to hear what Luke was going to say. Whatever force was torturing him has already clutched him up, torn him from his body and tossed him into another time, place and self, to relive his mistakes yet again, powerless to stop them. How much of him would be left, if he ever escaped this?
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